#1

Being misunderstood sucks. I really did try to put it more eloquently than that. But sometimes, the truth can't be prettied up. Even when it seems like the whole world would be more comfortable if it was.

My mom recently sent me a little story she came across on social media. The moral was that people are more comfortable with a well-dressed lie than the naked truth. To be fair, sometimes the truth is messy, sometimes it's complicated, sometimes hurtful, and other times ugly, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't tell it.

I've been guilty of speaking whatever lends itself to comfort, though. Most of the time, actually. I loathe the fact that my tongue is so trained to do so. I need to practice what I preach, and this blog will be my "practice" area. I won't shy away from the truth, the uncomfortable. I'll show myself kindness in the process. This will be a place for me to be raw and honest, insecurity be damned.

I can't say what the trajectory of this space is going to be. I could try, but it's already different from when the thought first entered my mind. For now, it's going to be conversations with God. My own personal, vulnerable conversations with Him. The idea of it makes my skin crawl a bit. And it may be uncomfortable by conventional standards. What I write might not be poignant or eye-opening. I won't promise a theme or a certain number of posts per month. But it will be stripped down and vulnerable. That's the challenge I hope to live up to because it's a pivot I need to make in my own life. Maybe, if I start writing unfiltered truth, it'll become less uncomfortable, more habitual, and flow more easily when I speak to others face to face.

I hope my decision to push past the discomfort will institute a desire for truth to burn within you and mercy (toward others and yourself) to roll off your tongue. But even more, I hope that it will make you feel safer in God's arms than you ever have. I’m able to hope that genuinely for you because I desperately want it for myself.

So, fellow imperfect human, will you meet me in this place and choose to rely on the invisible rhythms of grace to take us from one moment to the next?

Song of the day: IT’S OK by Nightbirde